Earlier today I was in my car listening to a song by John Mayer. That song was “Say What You Need to Say” and it got me thinking. First off, that song has some well written lyrics. The ones that caught my attention were, “You better know that in the end – It’s better to say too much, than never to say what you need to say again.” I think all too often we really do not speak our truths. We were brought up with the old saying, “It’s better not to say anything at all than to say something hurtful.” Well, to me, that is just not true. Don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating to go out and say some hurtful things to people. What I am saying is that sometimes those tough conversations (Saying what you need to say) rather than silence is really the right thing to do. It might be hurtful at first, but I truly believe that you need to say what needs to be said. One method I use when I am faced with tough conversations is to begin with, “(name), it is because I love you that I say this to you. If I didn’t love you so much, I wouldn’t say anything.” When I do that, it seems to change the tone of the conversation and the message is heard.
So, say what you need to say but do so in a loving and compassionate way.
Peace and compassion,